Fresh Speaking
(Judy's notes from the Lord's Day, January 15, 2012)
B.R. - The Lord really does speak in two kinds of ways. He speaks a constant word, and an instant word, and we have to bold enough to say that He does speak an instant word to us, not just the constant word of the Bible, but He speaks directly to us at specific ways and specific times in an instant way. He also does that in the church, and He speaks to the church in Willoughby in an instant way too. We're almost afraid to say that sometimes, not to say that He's not speaking to many others, He's speaking to everyone, but He does speak to us too.
Over the last year, as we've gone through Colossians and Philemon, we can really see a line of His speaking. He's taken us in a direction, in an instant speaking, an instant word, not just opening the constant word to us so that we can see this point over here, that point over there, but He's saying, "Do this now, come this way". He's taken us in a specific line of speaking also, in an instant kind of speaking. When we were in Colossians, as we came to the end of the book, we started to see, that in that book, there is a big picture there. What a line we saw through it! Colossians begins with the gospel, and then we find out that this gospel results in "Christ in you". It's not just the gospel. It mentions the redemption, the forgiveness of sins, it mentions this all inclusive One, this Christ, and then, it is "Christ in you!" and we see that there's a line right there - the gospel, redemption, forgiveness, life. There's a line even in that. As we went through Colossians, we began to see much more, that that line was really enlarged and opened up to us, until at the end of Colossians, we began to see this life that came into us, and has produced the Body of Christ on the earth, a living thing, and that this Body of Christ is more than just a living thing, in reality, Christ is all and in all, Christ is the Person in that Body. We saw that picture in Colossians, and then, we got a little glimpse of that picture by looking at the letter to Philemon, which opened up the picture of what we saw in Colossians. Now, we can look at Philemon and say, "Oh! That's what it looks like!" It looks like this little group of saints in Colossae, living in the local church, living the church life together, dealing with the Lord together, and being with one another in the Lord together. And so, when we saw that picture, it opened up Colossians even more! To us here, in the little church in Willoughby, the Lord showed us a line. He took us through Philemon, it was like, "Look, look, look! This is what I'm doing!" He opened up a line to us, and we all have to humbly say, not just an opening up of Bible teaching, but His speaking to us for the here and now, "This is what I'm doing here and now". A very living speaking, a very instant speaking, "Right now, here's what I'm saying to you, about your life, right now. So it's an instant kind of speaking. This is how the Lord was speaking to us, and has been continuing to speak to us. He's shown us at line, from the high vision in Colossians, and then the picture in Philemon. Why did He then take us to the story of Mary in John 12? The Lord continues to speak, He doesn't seem that He has dropped the line, and He's opening up more and more. It's like the opening of a flower, petal after petal, after petal. He opens up a little bit, and there's many more petals to be opened for that flower. It seems like through eternity, the petals will continue to open, but at least for now, why would He go from that picture we see in Colossians and Philemon, then, all of a sudden to John 12, and Mary and Martha, and then to come to the rest of John 12 too, as He enters into Jerusalem. In Colossians, there are some verses that we touched on, but it seems the Lord would not let them go. He would say, "You touched on these verses, yes, but there's more there", and that is there are verses in Colossians. If you turn your Bible to Colossians 2:12, let's read just the first phrase, "Buried together with Him in baptism". Then, in chapter 3:3, the first phrase, "For you died". What? Buried together with Him in baptism? What? We didn't touch the whole thing, and the second part, the "for you died" part, we read, and your life is hidden with Christ, and Christ our life, (emphasizing life), but we didn't touch so much upon "buried with Him" and "for you died". It's almost as if the Lord is saying, "Not so quick". We really need to get a view of what He's doing, and a view of His heart, and of His way, and a view of the way He is working, what He is after. Initially He brings us to Mary, and you see one pouring out upon the Lord. We have to appreciate the matter of the Lord being our first and best love, and worthy of everything to be poured out upon Him! He is the One worthy of the treasure of our heart, our greatest treasure, to be poured out upon Him, and even not just the treasure to be poured out, but in the pouring out, there is the breaking of the alabaster flask. We see that little glimpse, and the Lord says, "You see that picture there in Colossians and Philemon, look at Mary, don't forget, that this is the center! The center of everything is the love upon the Lord Himself, the pouring out of the love to the Lord Himself, which comes out of the breaking. Then He goes on in chapter 12, but it's significant that the Lord would bring us back in an instant speaking and say, you've seen something of the big picture, you saw something rich out of Colossians and Philemon, of the Lord's purpose, His desire, what He's doing today, and then, all of a sudden, He almost refocuses us on Mary, upon the Lord Himself, to be in love with this One, in pouring out our heart upon Him, and even willing to be broken and poured out upon Him. So, He brings us back to that, something so sweet, and so rich that is His instant speaking. Then, after that story, immediately following the story of Mary, the Lord begins His move. In a way, we can say that for the last three years, He's been speaking, teaching, speaking, revealing, shining, teaching. From this moment, after Mary pours out upon Him, from that little picture there in Simon the leper's house, now He's moving, now He is on a walk, He is taking His last walks. This little story of Mary occurs just a couple of days before the Passover. On the Passover, Jesus is on the cross, He's dying, so He's in His last activity after this story. It's really interesting, in John 12: 12-18. Have you ever heard of this story referred to as "the triumphal entry"? When Jesus enters into Jerusalem, it's referred to in Christian literature and among Christians as "the triumphal entry into Jerusalem". The other gospels speak of how some laid their clothes down, brought palm branches waving them, putting them down on the ground, crying out, "Hosanna! Save now!" What a moment! Have you ever heard the terms, incongruence and dissonance? I remember in college, having a music appreciation class, and a prominent feature of music during a certain period of time was dissonance. It's when you play a nice chord, and all of a sudden there is dissonance. Let me demonstrate on the piano. Here is a pleasing sounding chord, and now I'll add to that one that is not pleasing to the ear, this is dissonance, something didn't quite fit. Incongruence is the same kind of thought, something doesn't quite fit into the picture. As you read through the story you can almost see that the Lord is in another realm, and there is some dissonance. I think maybe the Lord is the fine chord, and the dissonance is everybody else. I was thinking earlier that the Lord was dissonant, but no, the Lord has to be the perfect chord. The great crowd had come to Him. The crowd that had come to the feast must have been thousands of people! The Jews were all coming to Jerusalem for the feast of the Passover, that's huge! That's everyone from all around. They heard Jesus was coming. They had heard all the stories, about this One who's been walking around the Sea of Galilee for the last couple of years. This One's coming! Not only that, but the ones that had been there when He said, "Lazarus come out!", they were saying, "I saw it when He called that guy out of the grave, see, that guy over there, that's Lazarus!" So they're testifying as Jesus is coming into the city. The whole crowd comes, and not only is there a whole crowd there, but there's this other crowd, maybe a bit littler than the other crowd, and they were proclaiming what He had done! But, don't you get the sense when you read, that there's a little dissonance because shouldn't He be on a white horse? A young donkey? A donkey's colt? Have you ever seen someone on a donkey? It's like their feet are almost touching the ground. A donkey's not all that big, and you're bouncing along as you're going, and then, on top of that, they're shouting, "Hosanna! King of Israel!" These aren't fitting into the chord here, there's almost a dissonance there, a little incongruencey in what you see. But, there's ones shouting, "Hosanna! King of Israel!", there's ones shouting, "I saw Him do it, He raised that guy, there's Lazarus over there! He was dead! He was in the tomb for four days. Jesus told people to roll the stone away, and then He yelled into the tomb, and out came that guy! He was still wrapped up in the cloths, I saw it happen!" There was a whole crowd of people testifying that way. What a moment for a would be king to take that place, to take that high place of the king, but this One found a little donkey, and He came riding in on the donkey. This One's quite different, everything's going on out here, the Lord's doing things the other way, He's riding on a little donkey. Then, in verse 19, the Pharisees said, "You are not doing anything worthwhile, they're all going after Him". So, you have a crowd proclaiming the resurrected Lazarus, a crowd waving palm branches, laying things down, and a little quiet man coming in on a donkey, and the Pharisees are saying, we are losing everything, they are all going after Him. Then there were some Greeks. Let's read a verse, it's in 1 Cor. Paul says, "the Jews seek after a sign, the Greeks after wisdom, but we preach Christ, and this One crucified". The Jews seek after a sign, so, what do you have in this picture? "We saw Him raise a guy from the dead!" And the Greeks seek after wisdom, and these Greeks came to Phillip. Some would like to see a sign, some are there because of signs, "This One can do miracles!" Others said, "We like to hear what He has to say, we just want to have this private audience. It's an attractive thing, You speak because You have wisdom. So for the Greeks, their coming is for that, "We heard stories about what He did, but we'd like to hear what He has to say". You have Jews and you have Greeks, and then the Lord, how does He answer this? Again, the incongruency is so sweet from the Lord. He's not interested in the Jews seeking a sign, he's not there to give a sign. He's not so interested in the Greeks seeking after their wisdom . He's not there to dispense great wisdom. They came to Phillip from Bethsaida, "Sir, we wish to see Jesus. Phillip came and told Andrew, and they came to tell Jesus that the Greeks want to have an audience with You. Did Jesus answer by saying, "It's good for everybody to be here, for I'm the King" ? NO!!! The Lord said, "The hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified. Truly, truly I say unto you that unless a grain falls into the ground and dies, it abides alone, but if it dies, it bears much fruit. He who loves his soul-life loses it; he who hates his soul-life in this world shall keep it unto eternal life. If anyone serves Me, let him follow Me, and where I am, there will My servant be. If anyone serves Me, the Father will honor him". In our reading of the Bible, for example, in Colossians, we may stop in our reading or our reading may be according to our concept. In Col.1:14, it says, "In whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins", we may see the cross as only redemption, the forgiveness of sins. We might see only that aspect of the cross. We may read John 12:24 according to what we read in Col., however, where in these few verses in John 12 is there any mention of redemption, and the forgiveness of sins? The Lord said, the grain of wheat falls to the ground, dies, bears much fruit. There is no mention here by the Lord, of the redemptive aspect of His death. The redemptive aspect is there, we know that the Lord died a redemptive death. Two thousand years ago, Jesus Christ died once for all, we are all redeemed, but here, in speaking of His death, He is saying, a grain of wheat falling into the ground, dying, producing many grains, follow Me! He is not emphasizing here the redemptive aspect of His death, He is emphasizing here, the life imparting aspect of His death! Again, in His speaking, there's incongruence. They're talking about the signs that He did, the Greeks are here seeking a private audience with Him for some wisdom, and He says, "a grain of wheat falls into the ground, dies, many grains, much fruit, follow Me!" Then He prays, "Father glorify Yourself, glorify Your Name. How sweet that the Lord brought us to see the "big picture", the riches in Colossians, and then to see the picture lived out in the letter to Philemon, where we see the "everyday" local church life with problems, yet, Lord is working there in the church. There it is in Philemon. Then the Lord would say, come back to this story of Mary, pour out everything on Him, then, be a grain, I'm a grain, I will fall into the ground and die. He's produced every one of us as grains. He fell into the ground and died, now He's produced many grains. Then He says, follow Me, come My way to lose your soul life, lay down your soul life. In a sweet sense here, the Lord, in His mention here of the cross, it's not a "lone, only Him" cross. This story includes us. "I'm going to go, I'm going to lay down, there's one grain going in, and I'm producing many grains. Now you, you go into the ground and die. Follow Me!" Then In His prayer in John 17, He says, "Father, glorify Your Name". In John 15 He says, "In this the Father is glorified" you bear much fruit. It means, you go into the ground and die and bear that fruit. So the Lord begins here to open up much more. It seems that the Lord would remind us that this is there in Colossians, this picture of the cross, this experience of the cross. It's not just the understanding of the cross, it is the experience of the cross and that in this part, in John 12, He's not talking just about the cross that He died on, but He's saying, lay down your soul life, that this cross, this experience of the grain of wheat dying, this would be your experience too. "If you want to follow Me, then follow Me, this is the way we go". This is the story of the grain falling into the ground to die. This is the story of the cross, the grain, falling into the ground to die. So, back in the 1700's, the verses to the song we sang this morning, "At the Cross, At the Cross" were written. Then, later, in the 1800's, the chorus was written, and oh! It's glorious! "At the cross, at the cross where I first saw the light, and the burden of my heart rolled away, it was there by faith I received my sight, and now I am happy all the day!" It's been about 100 years since that chorus was written. Can we say that today? We have to be bold, and we can be bold and say, "Lord, there's even more than just the burden of my sins rolled away, but this cross includes me, I'd go through that experience, Lord, take us through that experience, in fact, Lord, we will not be satisfied, we will not be short of fully experiencing You. Does that mean no more me? The Lord says, "Amen, it does", Then I'd say, "That's okay, Lord, I'll go through it with You". So, the Lord would lead us in such a way. Let's look at Matt. 16:24, this is right after Peter said, "You are the Christ, the Son of the living God", "Blessed are you, Simon, the son of John, the Father has revealed this to you. On this rock I will build My church. I am going to the cross". Peter replied, "Oh Lord, do not do that! Jesus answered, "Get behind Me Satan". Then, verse 24, "Then Jesus said to His disciples, if anyone wants to come after Me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow Me". So, we see the facts, but we can also see the reality of the experience. We all, right now, we are proof of the effectiveness of the cross, not just in Jesus Himself, but also in others. We can be bold like that in that way. Although it's the Lord's cross, others, throughout the ages have also laid down their lives, and one of them for sure was Paul. Let's read 2 Cor. 4:12. When the Lord first was resurrected, this life was imparted. Ones began to experience this life, and that was all new. They didn't have the New Testament to read. They didn't have someone else's experience to go by, so they were putting down, they were writing down their experience, what was happening, what they had come into. 2 Cor. 4:12, was what Paul had realized, "So then death operates in us, but life in you". Isn't that something! He realized that "I'm a grain too! I'm a grain of wheat too! Death operates in me so that life can come out of others!" Wow! What a shining, what a light! It just seems that the Lord is saying, "Okay, now, look at the big picture". Know that the Lord is after this one new man. He's after the body of Christ expressed on the earth, Christ lived out on the earth, the one new man living out Christ. He's after that! The place in which that is happening is in the churches, in the church. I can't live out the one new man all by me, I can't do it all by myself. You can't live out the Body of Christ all by your lonesome, it just doesn't happen. You're just one little portion of the Body. The Body of Christ is a corporate thing so we know this, but the Lord would bring us back and say, "The way that we would go, for Me to reach My goal, is the way of the cross". You become nothing, you and I, hallelujah we have died, we died with Christ, and the Lord is working that out in reality in us, and as we die, like Paul says, life is produced in others. We experience the Lord, for sure, His presence is so rich, in the midst of the cross, life is produced. We saw something which was so rich and high in Colossians and Philemon, and the Lord would bring us back and almost reground us again, "Okay, you should be back on the ground now, you took a look at the high picture, now get your feet back on the ground". The way this works is that it's the grain of wheat, it's Mary loving the Lord, being drawn just to pour out everything, willing to be broken, willing to pour upon Him, and then the Lord says, "Now, a grain of wheat's going into the ground to die, follow Me". It brings us back to that simple point of Colossians, which we briefly touched upon when we were in the book, and we can say, there it is, right in the heart of the Christian experience, that the Lord's after, He's producing something that's on His heart, that His heart is after, He is producing the Body of Christ living out, and in the heart of that is the experience of the cross where it is no longer you and I, but Christ that lives in us. Testimonies: P.O'B. - I like this scripture that you gave us, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh. I remember last week someone shared how disappointed everyone was when the Lord had revealed to them the way of the cross. They all had expectations, concerning the Roman occupation that they would be at the top of everything. They were very disappointed when the Lord mentioned to them what really works, but, when you consider, this is how the Lord reveals Himself. For example, I went to a wake last week for a 55 year old man that I used to work with. His wife is a believer. I went with a believer whose daughter had been in a serious car accident resulting in brain and central nervous system damage. In most people's estimation, her life is a mess. When the dad and I were in line to talk to the widow of the deceased, she said, "Your daughter has been a light to me while my husband has been suffering. So, my friend's challenged daughter, who doesn't have a comfortable soul life, had been the life source to this woman as her husband was dying. The daughter doesn't have a lot of the things we take for granted, but she has the Lord, and He can manifest Himself through a broken human being. So, even beyond our concept, this higher thought that Jesus has given about breaking and dying, it even goes past what we expect. Like John says, it's going to take an eternity to figure out this cross, it's going to take an eternity to see the revelation of God Himself, because even in this story, if we're attentive we realize that Jesus went away and was hidden from them. They didn't get it, and they didn't believe into Him. They wanted to satisfy themselves, and that's not the way, that's not the way God presents Himself. He's presenting Himself, on the earth today, in broken believers. D.B. - We sang a song earlier, in the Lord's Table about "now I'm happy all the day". God is happy all the day? What does this verse say here? "But now is My soul troubled." This is a dissonance, or are we a dissonance? Jesus said, "But now is My soul troubled, but what shall I say? Father, save Me out of this hour, but for this reason I have come to this hour". I think it's in Matthew 11 that the Lord said, "Come to Me all who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest". Rest, rest, don't you like that word? I might not be so happy all the day but I can have rest. He said, "Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am meek and lowly in heart, and you will find rest". The Lord's yoke here, was just that He was one with the Father's will. At this point He said, "But now is My soul troubled". I know in my own experience, when I'm just living for myself, isn't life just a labor and a heavy burden, just think about it in your own soul, it is, isn't it? Mine is, it's a labor and heavily burdened, but the Lord told us to come to Him, to learn from Him and to take His yoke on us, and we're able to find rest for our what? For our souls. So, on one hand, we loose our soul-life, and what we gain in the future, all our plans and aims don't really bring us happiness anyway, and our ambitions, and what we want to do, and how we want to live, and when we want to retire, just our soul life actually brings a lot of pain and no rest. No matter what you gain in this world, it cannot bring you rest. But, when we come unto Him, and just take His yoke on us. I don't know what that is necessarily, but I know the yoke the Lord was under as a man, was the Father's will. The difference between us and other people, just to take the Lord's will and in a sense, lay down your soul life, that means all my plans, all my ambitions, all my seeking of happiness in my little, however long it might be, life, we just lay it down. My living, my life, is just to come to the Lord and take His yoke, but many times when we take this way, our soul is troubled. What have I to say? Lord, Father, I want this. The Lord wants to keep us, supply us, and make us able to take this way, and we're really able to find rest in Him. The result of that is everything that was shared. The Lord truly gets His desire. Like in Isaiah 53, the Lord will see the fruit of His travail. The Lord will be pleased for His good pleasure. Our living, our little lives, our everything is for His satisfaction, to see the fruit of His travail, and have good pleasure in us and on the earth. M.L.- I saw something today that has been shared here. Number one, when we get into the Word, we think we know the Word, especially because we think we are so expert in extracting one word, one phrase, which becomes isolated, and a stand-alone verse. With the sharing, I began to see, this really makes sense, not only the epistles are related to the gospel, the gospel really lays the foundation to all the epistles developed. Even with the gospel of John, chapter 12, something I didn't see before that the verse quoted, 1 Cor. 1, when Paul says, the Jews require signs, and the Greeks seek wisdom, actually these are both in this chapter 12 of the gospel of John, and therefore, when we deal with each story by itself alone, you just don't see that. Not only Jews require a sign, and Greeks seek knowledge, the third item, the Paul said, "I preach Christ crucified". In here you can see in John 12:9, "A great crowd came not because of Jesus only, they didn't come to see Jesus only, but that they might also see Lazarus. They wanted to see the sign, the miracles. In verse 20, "And there were some Greeks among the crowd, and they wanted to find out who is this Jesus and what and why is He doing this? They wanted to get an answer for all the things about the knowledge, the wisdom, and so they came. They didn't go to Jesus directly, they went to Phillip, and Phillip could not answer that question, so they go to Andrew, and neither can Andrew answer the question, so they two, together, went to Jesus, and what did Jesus say to them? Verse 23, "Jesus answered them saying, the hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified. Truly, truly I say unto you, unless a grain of wheat falls to the ground and dies", so, this is a revelation, right? I preach Christ crucified. So, in this the first thing by which I was really impressed, don't read the Word and isolate the story, sentence, or phrase, then you see the whole thing. Number two, that's why I like to fellowship. Sometimes I can read and read, and read, and I just don't get that much, but when somebody points it out, your eyes will really be opened. When Paul wrote that letter, that's based on this chapter, it's not a sign that got you saved, it's not Bible knowledge that got you saved, but it is Christ crucified, the grain of wheat that fell to the earth and died. Earlier, in the Table meeting, we sang that song, "at the cross, at the cross where I first saw the light". I was wondering what kind of light did I see? For sure, I saw my sins taken away, because the burden of my sins rolled away. We see that Christ accomplished redemption for us, that we come to Him, our sins are forgiven. Much further, the light shined upon us. It is not only that our sins are rolled away, are forgiven, but the Lord said, I want to get into you, become the reality in you. Therefore, this verse says that unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies. No problem, it is that the Lord went to the cross He died, therefore, we're okay, but the verse didn't stop there. Again, you continue, if anyone wants to serve Me, follow Me. It means if I fall into the ground and die, if you want to serve Me, if you really want to become a Christian, then follow the pathway of the cross, follow Me, that means you die also. So in here, I really appreciate this. In order for us to really enjoy this and have the reality in us, we need to come to the Lord and sit at His feet all the time. Let the Word dwell in us richly, therefore, we will not grasp only one phrase, one sentence, or one chapter, or one story, and think we get it, but let all the word, the continuation of what the Lord is saying get into us. The second thing is that not only do I read myself, but I enjoy the fellowship of all of the saints, let the one who is really seeing help me. Let Paul see it, which I didn't see it, let his epistle unveil all the things to me. So, our fellowship is on the teaching of the apostles and prophets, so the church is built up. So, in here, the reality for my Christian living is not only that my sins are forgiven, but the Lord has to be my reality. He has to come into me and bring me into reality and be like Him, buried together with Him and raised up together with Him, because His point here is not just to die, but many grains can be brought forth, the glory of God can be seen. So, today, the Lord's desire, "He is happy all the day", it is not just because we know Him in an outward way, He is happy because we have Him as our reality. I really enjoyed this morning's fellowship. V.T. - I enjoyed the fellowship too. Sometimes, with all the verses, it is hard to know where this is all heading. "To die is to live", this seems like the grand contradiction, why would this be, but I enjoyed all the verses we read. John 12: 24 says, "Truly, truly I say unto you, unless the grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it abides alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit". As it was brought out, as you read a little further into it, this was a grand time. He could have capitalized upon something for Himself, because He had a lot of attention brought on Himself. He had the crowds there waving and shouting "Hosanna!", and everything, but He realized that wasn't what He had been called for, that wasn't what the Father wanted, so He kept the view in mind the whole time. He preferred to be that grain of wheat to fall into the ground to die that He could produce many grains for the church. That's why there are so many verses in the Bible, and it's hard to know just by looking at one, and it all pulls together. It reminded me of when we were reading in 2 Cor. 4:10, it says, "Always bearing about in the body the putting together in death of Jesus that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our body". He said that the killing of the cross results in the manifestation of the resurrected life. This daily killing is for the release of the divine life and resurrection. That's what the Lord kept in mind, but you see that He had a struggle just as we have a struggle, we have a choice, because we even see in verse 27, "Now is My soul troubled". This is the Lord, how could we be above Him, so we have that daily struggle too. "Now is My soul troubled, and what shall I say? Father, save Me out of this hour. But for this reason I have come to this hour". He knew His whole life was to die, but through the death, we would live, so our whole life is for this resurrection. I don't really comprehend it, I don't fully understand it, but in going through these verses and seeing a little snippet, I have the aspiration that the Lord would unveil more to me. What does it mean, "to die to live"? But, I do see that our whole calling, calling us to be believers is not that we would just have the forgiveness of sins, but the Lord wants that resurrection life, because the more we are with Him, the more we are dying to self through the situations that He puts us in, the more that He can come forth, and not just for us, but for this Body of Christ. So I appreciate the words. As we read, I think all of us are considering, "What does this mean?", and we try and put it together, but that's what I think the Lord wants us to do, to endeavor, to "mine out", but it's not going to be an easy process because the Lord really wants to unveil, but it's through the members of the Body, each bringing something out that we could have an understanding. So, I just appreciate the Lord in His Word. K.G. - I appreciate all the sharing this morning. As I was reading these verses this week, I thought, I didn't enjoy these verses. We say that we enjoy the verses, but sometimes we don't, we don't get something. This is a dark chapter, if you ask me, the only bright spot is Mary there, but the rest, no one understood what the Lord was doing, not one. The disciples were in the dark, they were blind, the crowd was blind, the Pharisees were very blind, the Greeks were seeking the wrong thing, and the whole chapter just seemed negative to me. But, to see the term "dissonance" helped me. The pleasing chord was the Lord in His going to die, and everyone else's reactions and expectations were that wrong key. So, I just appreciated that in the church, the pleasing chord is our dying. It's our dying to self, and what comes out of it is life, resurrection, that's pleasing. Any resistance to that, I always resist. I appreciate "Now is my soul troubled", the Lord's word there. I'm always troubled about dying to self, I resist, I guess everybody does, but you notice it more in yourself, that's dissonance, but what comes out of our dying is resurrection life, that's so bright and life giving. D.B. - I just appreciate all the sharing too. All my dissonance, that's another thing that the Lord took and bore. I experience the dissonance when I'm in myself, and the Lord took care of that, "I am the way, the reality, and the life", and we can come together through Him, through all He's accomplished, redemption, and also producing His life in us, regenerating us. We can appreciate that. B.B. - Our concept seems to be, if we come to the Lord then He will take care of us and meet all our need, and He does that, but His way is apparently dissonant, but it's our concept that's dissonant! His way is with harmony, and He knows the best way to meet your need is that you would die to yourself. That takes care of the dissonance, and then you would enjoy Him in full. "How precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of His saints" (Psalm 116:15). We would have a hard time understanding what does that mean, that doesn't sound very good. It should be "precious in the sight of the Lord is the living of the saints", but it says dying to the self, and when you die to self, then the Lord is alive in you, and He is glorified instead of you. He is glorified and the Father is glorified. The Lord really is different than our way, and what a rest when we enter into His way.